No Debit Just Credit

Halloween is normally my favorite holiday. There isn’t anything better than horror movie marathons and buckets of cavity-inducing candy.

I woke up on Halloween excited for the day ahead of me. Even though I was scheduled to work the closing shift I was confident that nothing could ruin my favorite holiday. I was wrong.

Before going into work I had already assumed that it would be an easy going day. It’s Halloween and everyone is going to be out. Nobody is coming to Target right? When I walked into work at 3:55pm everything about the place said “Run as fast as you can and never come back.” I ignored my better judgement and clocked in for what was about to be my worst shift in retail ever.

For starters, the systems were down. All of them. Our cash registers were only taking cash and credit and all of our other “process-related” devices were down. How do you run a retail store with barely functioning registers and malfunctioning computers? The answer is not well. My early assumptions that the store would be a ghost town fell flat when a sea of last minute candy shoppers raided our aisles. Now we have cash registers that are moving at the slowest possible pace and they are only taking certain types of payments. Blumhouse couldn’t produce a better horror story than this one.

What happens when a community that relies on using EBT cash and stolen gift cards can’t use their questionable forms of payment? They yell. Who do they yell at? Me. For eight hours I had to listen to angry customers yell about how stupid I am for breaking Target’s computers. I wanted to break Target’s computers, I held back. One lady got upset over fifty cents. FIFTY CENTS. When I get to the point in life where I am yelling about fifty cents somebody please dig a plot and throw me in the ground.

After eight hours of frustration, yelling, theft, and the occasional suicide joke my night was finally over. Halloween had been a horrifying experience and I had escaped with only some mental health damage. As much as I want to go home and watch Michael Myers slaughter obnoxious teenagers I have to be at work at eight in the morning.

Hopefully after tomorrow I won’t need anger management courses.

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